The Unconventional Family Vacation

Since its original release in November 1991, I’ve been completely smitten with Disney’s Beauty & The Beast. To clarify, I don’t mean that I’ve watched the movie a couple of times and listened to the soundtrack once or twice. I LOVE it. Like really, madly, truly adore it. I’ve seen the movie hundreds of times and know it by heart. I know every song, each nuance in the music and the feelings they mean to induce. To say it’s my favourite doesn’t even begin to do my feelings for it justice. I’d post a picture of my B&B paraphernalia but I don’t think I could fit it all without my wide angle lens!

I was 17 when my parents first took my brother and I to Disneyland in California. I was trapped in the “Too Cool For Everything” phase of teenager life, but still wasn’t too proud to find Belle and have a picture taken with her. In the 18 years that have since passed, I have grown to greatly respect and admire Walt Disney and the passion he had to make his dream come true. What’s great about this accomplishment is that he created a place that makes me feel like I’ve slipped into an alternate universe every time I walk through the gates. Magical indeed.

My children are lucky little humans. We’ve been to a Disney park 4 times: 2008 (Disneyland Paris), 2009 (Disneyland California), 2013 (Disney World Florida) and 2015 (Disney World Florida). The jury’s out on who those trips were actually for because if you’ve seen the pictures, my smiles are pretty darn huge! We’ve never done these trips as a single family unit, always with a group. In Paris, my girls and I were in Europe meeting up with my mom and visiting family that lives abroad. The 2009 trip was with my dad and his girlfriend and the two trips to Florida were with our blended family.

It’s been almost a week since I returned from the 15-day Florida vacation that I went on with 9 other people. Me, my hubby, our 3 kids, my mom, my dad, dad’s girlfriend (my parents are divorced, but super fun peeps to vacay with), dad’s girlfriend’s sister and the sister’s daughter. We rented a big ‘ol 15 passenger van, a great house with a pool and spent pretty much every waking moment together. This is our second time doing this particular holiday, although the living together for 2 weeks was a new element this time around.

There are a ton of people that are going to find this whole set up pretty strange because I remember how hesitant I felt about it the first time. But when I made the decision to change how I was looking at and anticipating it, it ended up becoming something very special. We have a blended family, like so many families in the world today and this particular dynamic is all my kids know. They’re not interested in how it all fits together because this is what family looks like to them. They believe they’re lucky to have so many people that love them and they’re right. Yes there have been some challenges over the years to really figure out what the dynamic is, but we’ve worked through it and we are better for it both individually and as an extended bunch.

I can honestly say that we’ve had an incredible time on both vacations and, when you’re vacationing with such a large group, I’d say that’s a huge accomplishment. When I’ve talked to people about embarking on these types of trips, I usually hear “Oh that’s so great for you guys, but we could never do something like that because (insert names here) don’t really get along all that well.” Yes it takes work, patience and checking some baggage at the door, but know that something like this isn’t impossible. It’s just largely unattempted and untried. Unconventional? Absolutely. But (if you hadn’t figured this out about me yet) I thrive on unconventional.

Each member of our group is very unique and for the most part it works to our benefit. Yes there were times of frustration or perhaps a lack of patience. There were 7 adults and 3 children and we are human after all. We get hangry. Tired. Thirsty. Sometimes one just has a need to be alone. In 15 days, we had 2 full travel days, 9 park days (5 days Disney and 4 days Universal), 1.5 pool days, 1 day at the Kennedy Space Centre, 0.5 shopping days (dollar conversions were yuck) and 1 day at Cocoa Beach. We were movin’ and shakin’ the entire time we were away and had a blast. And everyone came home in one piece (one a little scraped up from Mother Nature flexing her muscles), albeit tired and ragged, but we all made it home.

Every time I see the Magic Kingdom, I get butterflies in tummy and my heart starts to race. My inner 7-year old is dying to break into a Phoebe-style free run as soon as I spot the gates and my inner 16-year old is saying, “Play it cool. Play. It. COOL.” as my pace quickens to rival that of any competitive speed walker. I enjoy all the parks Disney World and Universal have to offer, but Magic Kingdom has my heart, particularly Fantasyland. If I ever had to be employed by someone else again, I’d want to be Belle in a Disney Park. My job would be to smile for pictures, sign autographs and just make people happy. Perfection.

Disney thru my eyes…indescribable. Every detail is there, exactly as you would expect it to be. The flowers, music, lettering choices on the different signage, decor. I stood in front of the castle at the end of Main Street and just closed my eyes, concentrating. When I opened my eyes, the people had vanished and the sounds had melted away. It was just me. I smiled, did a twirl and blinked and it was all back. I was here.

There is only one thing I would have changed about this particular trip. I have a very beautiful yellow dress (I’ll tell you why I have it and how I came to own it another time) that I really wanted to bring with me. Next to my wedding dress, it is the most stunning gown I’ve ever owned. My girls kept telling me they wanted me to bring it and wear it one night to the park because they wanted a picture of me in it in front of the castle. I’ll admit that my inner 7 year old was practically drooling at the prospect of that becoming a reality. I did a bit of research and found that wearing it to the park would likely not go the way I was hoping as Disney doesn’t “encourage” adults to dress like the characters in the park that interact with the crowds. In the end, I left that beauty hanging in my closet, but I did ask a couple of the Magic Kingdom employees about that policy. Turns out they (the Disney powers that be) feel it would be confusing for the kids and families if they saw more than one of a particular character, especially one wandering around a part of the park that they didn’t belong in. While the logical part of me understood and opted to follow the rules simply because I didn’t want to be kicked out, the B&B loving princess wannabe in me just wanted to wear the pretty dress. And if a few kids wanted an autograph, I’d be more than willing to do what needed done. Dare I utter the phrase “It’s not fair!”? Oh le sigh.

To my ecstatic surprise, they made a few changes to Fantasyland between our trips. Right at the back, just past the Be Our Guest restaurant and Gaston’s Tavern is a store that is DEDICATED to Beauty & The Beast. RIGHT?! I was like “Just pick me up at the end of the day. I’m gonna chill here.” I was in my own personal heaven. I went into sensory overload just wandering around. Books, journals, dishes, art, ornaments…I could have curled up with a glass of wine, blanket and pillow and the Beast’s untold story (bought a copy and it’s waiting patiently to be read!) and spent the rest of my holiday right there. However, the troops got hungry and we had to move on. As I backed away from the store, I turned and smiled. That tiny slice of time was a personal highlight of mine. And I’ll never forget it.

The memories we created on this trip will definitely last a lifetime, although there is one particular happening I’d like to forget that has been sent to the vault where it will forever live. To be honest, I believe that it’s important for my kids to have experiences traveling with different people. Granted it doesn’t always need to be to someplace like this, you learn some great people skills when you travel as a group. Our world has a desperate need for more love, compassion and understanding and there is no better place to start than with our family.

If you decide to conquer the Everest of unconventional vacations, here’s what I learned:
~ Be considerate and respectful. Of every one and every thing.
~ If you’re planning to all stay together, make sure you rent something with enough space. Every person needs to have their own private space to go to when they’re feeling tired, stressed, overwhelmed or if they just need a second to breathe. I know I’m not the only one who likes a few quiet moments alone to recharge the soul.
~ Equally share the household expenses. Split groceries, booze (if you like a nightcap or two) and goods between the adults. No one person should feel or be responsible for footing the bill. And don’t worry about who has how much of whatever. The best part about running out of some thing is the ability to replace it.
~ In addition to the point above, if someone decides to purchase something specifically for themselves, remember that it is not a community item. Even if it looks tasty and delicious, do not help yourself to it. Use your manners and ask. Respect their answer.
~ If you’re renting a vehicle for the group, pitch in your share for gas and parking. If you can’t afford to do that then you shouldn’t be on vacation.
~ Pitch in with everything. Dishes, laundry, general clean up. Every one is on holidays and wants to enjoy themselves. No one is running a maid service.
~ Allow people to have their moments. We are human and as such, we are allowed to have feelings of all sorts. Be patient, offer love, compassion and kindness instead of frustration and anger. Ask how you can help instead of choosing judgement. The tables will turn at some point and you may find yourself in need.

I am grateful for the moments, the memories and these incredible opportunities. Can’t wait for the next one.