The Consequences Are Yours Too

Best-laid plans. Everyone has them. I had fabulous plans to have some better (any) consistency around my writing and it’s been way too long since I posted a new entry. I’ve started so many different ones and then got stuck part way through. I usually take that as a sign that I need to take a step back, examine the topic from another angle. Or maybe it’s that I’m not meant to write about that topic at that time. Or at all. And damn am I wordy haha. I’ve tried shorter stuff, but it just feels…unfinished? Maybe? It’s a good thing I type fast because I type what runs through my mind. Get it out and then get it organized. That’s the process for me.

I thought that I kept hitting a block but, after some examination, I’ve realized that I filter my voice instead of really saying the things on my heart. As someone that is trying hard to break the people-pleasing cycle, I still have a hard time with the thought of hurting anyone with my words. I believe in honesty. Free speech. I believe in truth. Transparency. But I know that not everyone is ready for those things. I know that something being true for someone doesn’t make it true for everyone. Or maybe I should add a trigger warning to the front end so people proceed at their own risk. Let’s be real though, most people would be curious enough to keep reading. Ahhh the human condition.

I’ve always been a staunch supporter of people speaking their hearts and minds, respectfully of course and always with kindness. I’ve always encouraged my kids and the people in my life to speak freely. Your words are yours to speak. The tricky part that most forget is that, while you are free to say whatever you’d like, you are not free from the consequences of your words. I’ve taught my kids that we don’t need to agree on everything (nor will we) because we are family or friends or whatever. We will absolutely see things differently, experience things differently and that’s a really great thing. It doesn’t mean one of us is right and the other is wrong, but we do need to be respectful of the beliefs of others, even if we don’t agree with them. The lenses we see through are shaped by our own experiences, beliefs and understanding so of course our perspectives are different.

We live in a time where people misunderstand by choice. Some actively choose to create conflict where there isn’t any. They do it for sport. If they disagree with something they see, they try to bend others to their way of thinking instead of just moving on and accepting that different people have different beliefs, different thoughts and opinions. It’s such strange behaviour. I wonder when it got so bad or maybe when it got so bad it couldn’t be ignored. You can’t exist on socials these days without experiencing it first hand or watching it happen to someone you know. 

I want to let you in on a little secret. If you see something out in the world that you don’t agree with, an opinion that doesn’t align with you or maybe you come across a person that doesn’t feel like an energetic match for you, do you know what you can do? You can just move the fuck on. That’s it. Just keep on keepin’ on. That’s the big secret. Mind blowing, isn’t it? Perhaps not, but I assure you that if you master this skill, it will change your life. 

I understand that there are things in this world and online that are an absolute cesspool of shit. But the beauty of it is that you can choose not to participate in it. You can choose not to be a part of it. You can choose to take your precious energy and use it elsewhere. You get to decide what frequency you share with the world. I guarantee that you will always  find exactly what you’re looking to. Try to look for something good.

And if you can’t find the good, be the good. And if you can’t be the good, at least be quiet.